I was never one to believe in soulmates. The idea of there being just one man in the entire world that was my perfect match stressed me out. The world is full of people I will never meet. How was I going to find him and how would I know he’s “the one”?!
Mat and I held a similar, independent belief about ourselves for years: we would never get married – not to each other, not to anyone else. He was set with his single, testosterone-driven life: a “bachelor to the rapture” as he puts it; and I was happy to date, eat free dinners, see free movies, and never consider commitment because I didn’t believe there was any man that I could stand every day for the rest of my life. After three dates, I was done. I even went so far as to change my phone number when one guy didn’t take the hint. True story.
So how in the world did Mat and I find ourselves married?
Because we are, in fact, soul mates.
Let me clear something up: I am not a romantic. I have ruined plenty sweet, loving moments with my husband from laughing at all the wrong times. Romance doesn’t come naturally. I stopped enjoying RomComs years ago when I realized they are not realistic and I reserve my tears and emotion for animal deaths in movies (but I don’t go out of my way to subject myself).
I laughed during TITANIC and I refuse to see movies like THE BLIND SIDE because I know they’re inspirational. Heartless, right? Don’t even get me started on movies like MARLEY & ME. I know the dog dies in the end so why would I waste my time getting attached to all 22 stunt dogs?!
Sorry. Ahem.
My dad always told me that dating is like interviewing a potential candidate for marriage, “Don’t just date to date. Date to learn. Your dates will teach you more about who you are looking for when it comes to a long-term, serious relationship – even if it’s not them.” He probably said something more eloquent than that but that’s what I took from it.
He’s also quick to tell me about his 40+ girlfriends. High school girlfriends. I’m assuming he counted all his one-date relationships.
My mom, on the other hand, dated two guys. Both named Mike and she married the second one.
My parents will be celebrating 38 years of marriage in July.
That being said, I believe we are blessed with a multitude of soulmates and it’s literally all about timing. If I would’ve moved to Florida after high school instead of Washington, I believe I would’ve met someone there who I possibly could have married. Or maybe there’s a man in Maine who would’ve made me happy for the rest of my life. I don’t know for sure but it’s a belief I hold steady to.
In the same breath, I have faith in a higher power and I understand as clearly as 1 + 1 = 2 that Mat is my ultimate soulmate. I believe of all my soulmates, he is the most compatible and complimentary. I am lucky and thankful to’ve found him the first time around. He is my best friend and he truly does complete me. Alone we are wonderful but together we are extraordinary.
Hey look, I think that’s romantic-speak! I can do it!
I hope Mat reads this.
